Once upon a time, well,1795, in the bucolic hills and valleys of Keld in Yorkshire, England the somewhat eccentric Viscount of Keld, Richard Jacob caused to be built a tall sailing ship, the fabulous Mean Fish. Alas, the fully functioning and seaworthy vessel has been built in a tiny pond upon the grounds of the viscount's estate-far, far from the sea.

As the ship is outfitted, Richard, assuming the role of captain, begins his ship's log. Crew is hired, and shipboard routines are established. Naturally, crew and officers willing to sign onto the roster of a landlocked vessel are eccentric in their own rights.

As hard to describe as it is to put down, this gentle fable evokes the magic of The Princess Bride. Will Richard and the crew become skilled seamen? Will the love of the Viscount's life ever notice him? Why would anyone build a massive sailing ship so far from the sea? Who has stowed away on this stationary boat and why? And what is the deal with a mysterious ancient piece of masonry that haunts the Viscount's family home?